Organized Chaos and a Small Loophole

So this past month could be described using any of the following adjectives: insane, chaotic, draining, exhausting, hellacious, wild, shall I keep going???

Things all started when Bryan's 32 year-old heart decided to go into a-fib one night when we were chilling out on the couch. Literally, he was lying there watching t.v. and I think I might have been blogging... Anyway, to make a long story short, after an evening in the ER, several tests (to the tune of about $2000) and a heart monitor later, doctors have determined that there is actually nothing wrong with his heart. Did I mention that I am the ONLY one with a job around here? That extra expense was not needed. Am I glad my husband's heart is fine, yes. Are we even more poor now, double big fat yes. Is he worth every penny, yes, yes, yes! Look at this guy! Captured him in a genuine "moment."

After that little stressful week, we had Halloween. Lucy was of course sick the week before. She had one of her famous "fever viruses" which meant 104 degree fever for over a week. So pleasant. She was also diagnosed with a sinus infection. Antibiotics AGAIN (please be reminded that we had her adenoids out to stop all the sinus infections in August and she has since had 3 infections-oh joy!). She seemed to finally be fever free one Sunday morning, but something was odd. Is a throat full of pus normal? Didn't think so. One very hurried trip to the Sunday "emergency only" pediatrician's office and she'd been diagnosed with the adenovirus (no relation to the adenoids). Pus throat, no appetite, fever, and blah were the symptoms. Lucky for us, the pus-filled throat was the END of the virus. She missed a week of school. Her grandparents and I took turns missing work. Not a great time.

Did I mention that I was in the middle of my evaluation cycle during all this? Not sure if you've heard, but it SUCKS. Read below if you don't believe how incredibly STUPID the process is: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/07/education/tennessees-rules-on-teacher-evaluations-bring-frustration.html?pagewanted=all

Anyway, we survived all that and made it to Halloween weekend. Lucy wanted to be Dorothy from "Wizard of Oz." Not sure why. I was REALLY encouraging her strongly to be this adorable garden gnome:

She wanted nothing to do with that idea. So Dorothy it was! She has NEVER seen the movie, nor will she on my watch. It scares the bejeezus out of me. So, we dressed Dorothy up on Halloween night. It was chilly. Dorothy did not want to be in a sweater, but we gave her no choice. She was geared up and ready! She even practiced her "ARE THOSE FLYING MONKEYS?!" face.

We were just going to go up and down our street, however, Dorothy had other plans. As we got the last house on our street, she says, "I want to go to one more house." We told her to go to the door and we'd go to ONE MORE HOUSE. As she rang the bell and had her basket (with Toto in it) FILLED with candy, she says to us, "I want to go to A LOT more houses!!!" The kid is a huge fan of this "holiday." So much so that she has a fit every afternoon over eating candy. I finally got smart and dumped it all. Told her she ate it all and it was so delicious. I am so screwed when I can't lie to her anymore.

We were enjoying life, and a beautiful fall. We got through Bryan's heart issues, Halloween, and his moving to a new school (Clinton High School) for the remainder of his student teaching this semester. A few little glitches in our world, but we had recovered nicely from it all. We'd gone to the park some, spent good family time together, and we were all HEALTHY!!!

Then came last Friday. My in-laws were coming for the long weekend (Veteran's Day) instead of Thanksgiving. We were going to spend 4 days with them hanging out, doing a few projects around the house, and getting some much needed time shopping too! So Friday rolled around and Lucy and I were preparing dinner. Bryan had just lit the grill, and we were expecting Herb and Susan at any moment. The phone rings, Bryan answers, and then life got really nuts.

H&S had been in a terrible car accident about 4 miles from our house. Some nice lady had seen them run off the road and HIT A TREE. She got to them, but couldn't get them out of the car, as they were quite pinned in. She called us and Bryan was out the door. After many phone calls and worry, Bryan informed me that his dad had been removed via the jaws of life and was on his way to UT medical center with some pretty bad injuries. Susan was going to another hospital, and I was at home with Lucy, grill flaming.

I doused the grill, pulled dinner out of the oven and waited. I decided to call my parents to see if they could keep Lucy while I went to the hospital to be with Susan. Well, it came as quite a shock to me to find out my mom and dad were already AT the hospital. My mom had apparently been having some heart palpitations for a few weeks, but had some major ones and felt "not right" earlier in the day. Dad decided they needed to go to the ER. OH. NICE.

So, my help was out. I had to just chill and try to decided what the heck to do with ALL PARENTS incapacitated. Husband at one hospital, all other parents at the other. Me with a 2 year-old. Finally after a few hours, they released my mom from the hospital. A million tests later, her heart was still screwing up, but they didn't know why. They doubled her regular heart meds, sent her home on bedrest, and told her to follow-up with a cardiologist. I realize I am not a doctor, but REALLY?! Send her home with her heart still going nuts?!?!? I was not pleased. I got a call that they had seen my mother-in-law, and she was doing ok (what divine providence that they took her to the same hospital my parents were at!) and waiting on x-rays. We still had no idea the condition of Bryan's dad, except that he was in SERIOUS pain. Bryan was with him though, and they doctors were trying to get him stable.

I took Lucy and got my mom at the hospital. My dad stayed with Susan. We weren't sure if she'd need to be kept overnight. I got mom settled at home, and Lucy in bed. Susan and my dad showed up a bit later with GREAT news that she had no breaks, just some bruises! "Ok," I told myself, "things are nuts, but that is SOME good news. BREATHE." Later that night, we found out that Herb had a punctured lung, and several broken ribs-thus all the pain. The pain meds they were giving him at the hospital were making him violently ill though. Can you imagine all those injuries and on top of it all puking your guts out? POOR MAN! Bryan stayed with him all night. Bryan also talked to the police, figured out where the car was, AND went to the car in the middle of the night to retrieve all his parents' possessions, registration, meds, etc. You could say it was a LOOOOONG night. I stayed at my parents house with mom, dad, Lucy, and Susan. Quite a slumber party, and a bit of "organized" chaos.

After many trips back and forth to UT hospital, Herb finally go to come home on Sunday afternoon. He was banged up, on lots of pain meds, but so glad to be at a HOME. We spent the week in a nice fog. I was (and still am) worried about my mom, and we were busy taking care of the other set of parents-trying to make sure they were comfortable, relaxed, and ok with being stranded 500 miles from home. Here are the cutie pies all rested up:

Lucy of course kept them quite entertained. You know Lucy, our resident surgeon/ballerina/cheerleader/cowgirl. Why make her choose a career path now, right?

Leah came up and took our stranded house guests half-way home yesterday. Thanks to some sweet family friends who met them in Birmingham, they got home about 6 last night. We LOVED having them here, but I think they were ready to get home. I cannot imagine being stranded somewhere and being sick and injured. NOT FUN. I think they were very good sports about it all. Now they get to look forward to buying a new car! They'll be back at Christmas, this time I bet they'll be real careful around mile 496 of 500.

OH! Did I mention I woke on Thursday and was unable to stand? YEP! The hits just kept on coming. I had vertigo so incredibly bad!!! Bryan made me call in to work, and he did as well. He drove me to the doctor to find out two things: 1. My blood pressure was a bit high and 2. I had tons of fluid behind my ear. The doc put me on something that knocked me out along with a bit of Zyrtec (God's nectar for allergy sufferers) . While I was there, they tried to give me a flu shot. HA! I DO NOT DO SHOTS (I did however do the flu last year and it wasn't 1% fun), so I asked for the mist. I should interject here that my husband, trying to show me how tough he was, got the shot. Yep, right there in front of me. Didn't he know I could've passed out?! Or barfed?! Or both (per my usual). Nope, he just HAD to show off. Anyway, they were so kind to give me the mist. You know, the mist. What they give small children who are afraid of shots. Yep, I got the mist. The problem with the mist is that it is live. It kind of sort of gives you some flu-like symptoms. No worries, nothing a little Afrin and some advil cold and flu can't fix!

When all calmed down, and our house was quiet again, I disturbed the balance by decorating for Christmas. Yep, exhausted me ALREADY decorated for Christmas!!!!! Bryan of course thought it would've been a good idea for me to chill, but NOPE! I needed some more organized chaos. You see, we are pretty much skipping our usual Thanksgiving soiree this year, and the rule is I can't put Christmas up until T'giving is over. But HA! I found the loophole! No Thanksgiving at our house=I CAN put up the decorations NOW!!!! HE HE HE HE!!!!!! So, as you can see, I'm done!

We also managed to have a little birthday celebration for my mom on Saturday night. Heart monitor and all, we partied like senior citizens!

Lucy and I also had some time in between all the insanity to make Christmas gifts for the grandparents. She LOVED being in the middle of my paints and canvases. To her, it was BIG TIME! We had a blast, and the canvases turned out to be soooooooo cute!

After all that craziness, we're sort of back to normal now. This afternoon we went to the zoo, had a quiet dinner, and Lucy got to bed on time. Should I knock on some wood????

Raising a Toddler

1. DON'T ask, "Why did you do that?" Why did you bite that boy? Why did you hit your sister? Why is there spaghetti in your ear? Why am I asking you a question you can't possibly answer in any way that will make me feel better? Oh yes, because it's easier than accepting the idea that I am in charge of a tiny lunatic.

2. DON'T be surprised by the number of things that can end up in your toilet. This includes shoes, spatulas, cell phones, small animals, keys, and a whole eggplant that looks an awful lot like a human head to your middle-of-the-night eyes.

3. DON'T be surprised by the number of things that can NOT end up in your toilet.Number two, for example, can occasionally end up in your purse.

4. DON'T assume that repeating directions increases their likelihood of being followed. DON'T assume that repeating directions increases their likelihood of being followed

5. DON'T over-explain adult situations. "Sorry, honey. Mommy is just in a bad mood because she doesn't understand why she chose to make a living on the Internets. And taking out a second mortgage to fund your preschool appears not to have been the prudent thing to do. And wow, your sitter is expensive! That noise? Oh, that's just Daddy weeping through the wall."

6. DON'T say, "Let's wash your hair!" This is akin to saying, "Let's put this large needle in your eyeball." If you really feel like you have to warn your toddler about the upcoming sudsing, consider something relatively benign and tangentially related, like, "Let's put this large needle in your eyeball."

7. DON'T wear a short skirt to a toddler birthday party. You know that fantasy you have about being unintentionally violated by giddy elves? Yeah, me neither.

8. DON'T let a boy shorter than the toilet try to pee standing up. Too late for that? Try not yelling helpful tips like, "Point your penis up!" Too late for that? Wipe your chin.

9. DON'T ask if your toddler if he wants to do something you need him to do. This includes Do You Want To Wear A Jacket? Do You Want To Eat Something? Do You Want To Hug Grandma? Do You Want To Wash Your Hair? and Do You Want to Keep Me From Running Out The Door To Jamaica?

10. DON'T try to catch vomit in your hands. A) It doesn't work. B) You don't get points for trying. C) You get vomit in your hands.


(borrowed, but couldn't help but share!)

A Month in Pictures (and a few side notes from me)

I cannot believe we are already in mid-ish October.  Where in the heck is the fall going?!  It has been such a stressful beginning to the school year.  The new evaluation system has morale REALLY low in the schools.  Things just aren't as enjoyable as they used to be.  Plus, it has been a little hard for me to have a new bunch of kiddos after 2 years with my last class.  Anyway, I'm trying to stay positive and get through all the muck that is staring me in the face.  It is hard to be peppy and happy.

Bryan, who is VERY jazzed up about teaching, is staying positive though.  He was never a part of the field of education before now, so I guess he has never know the "other side" of things.  Anyway, in almost 12 years together, I have NEVER, EVER seen my hubby so happy.  I am THRILLED he loves teaching so much.  

Our schedule is pretty crazy these days.  We spend all the time we can with Lucy in the afternoons and evenings, but after she goes to bed, we're both working (although, I do take the occasional evening to watch some trashy show on t.v.-WAHOO for the KARDASHIAN WEDDING!).  We do try to make the most of our weekends, and have had some great times.

Thanks to Mimi for the duck costume.  Lucy has worn it well.  I thought we were going to get away with a FREE Halloween costume, but no luck.  Lu is now making us call her DOROTHY (yes, from that horrific movie "The Wizard of Oz") and we have now (by we I mean my mom) purchased a Dorothy costume.  So actually reading this I realize I am NOT actually out any money-sweet!  Gotta love some Grandparents!

We're of course always dressing Lucy in her appropriate FALL IN TENNESSEE ON A SATURDAY garb.  She now knows how to sing "Rocky Top" and will shout, "GOOOOOO VOLS!" when prompted.  LOVE IT!

We're also helping Lucy tap into her inner cowgirl.  I mean, don't all cowgirls wear pink boots and no pants?  Please note my husband CRACKING up in the background.  We seriously couldn't get her to wear pants this day.  And our new motto around the house is, "Don't Poke the Bear."  So she wore no pants.  No harm, no foul.

A few weekends ago, Ripley's Aquarium of the Smokies gave TEACHERS and their families FREE ADMISSION!  FREE people!  FREE!  That is like, well, MONEY around here!  So of course, we loaded up and drove to the mountains.   Bryan and I both love aquariums, and had high hopes for Lucy enjoying it too.  She really dug the large pumpkin decorations outside the place.  She actually sort of cooperated for a RARE picture of us together too!

Thanks to my amazing camera, I got some great shots.  

Lucy was quite fond of the penguins (I was too really.  They were CUUUUUTE!), and she made it about 45 minutes before she said her typical, "I'm all done."  Her FAVORITE part of the aquarium though...the person dressed as a pink shark (although she called it a dinosaur for some reason-too much Barney perhaps?).  Good thing this gig was free.  Perhaps in a few years she will appreciate the wildlife a bit more.  Oh well!  Please note that her DAD is with her and the strange person who agreed to dress like an idiot for the day, as I am still terrified of people in large headed costumes.

That same weekend, my roomie from college, Deborah (a.k.a Debster) and her husband Mark came to visit for a few days.  They were on a nice little road trip back to FL after Mark's med school rotations.  We had a BLAST, except I have NO pictures to prove that.  I cannot believe I didn't snap ONE PHOTO!  I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!

And perhaps the biggest news of all around here is that Lucy went on her first field trip this week!  How is this happening?!?!?  She is only 2 and a half!  Her little class at school (the NEW, GOOD class) went to the Pumpkin Patch.  I (being the paranoid person that I am) made my mom go with her (and really there was no arm twisting involved).  I was a bit nervous about my BABY being on a bus (yes, with her carseat) and then out in a pumpkin patch with no parent or grandparent with her.  It was the first time I realized how my own class of kids' parents must feel when we go on a field trip.  Kind of nerve racking!  Anyway, Lucy was so excited about riding on the bus and going on a trip with her little "PS1" class.  See exhibit 1 below:

Mom said Lucy was very well behaved and had a great time.  They went in a corn maze (she seemed a bit unsure of this-exhibit 2 below).

They saw some scarecrows, went on a hay ride, and of course picked a pumpkin!

Last but not least, the princess has been spending some time practicing being terribly cute.  Her moods still swing, her fuse is still short, but what a doll!

 

 

Life

We've been taking it easy for the past few weeks. Lucy seems to be healthy, although she hasn't slept all night in about a week (which generally means she's about to get sick...didn't I just say she was healthy?). We're all back in the swing of school, and have been somewhat back to our version of "normal." I'm still painting canvases for friends, which is so much fun and helps me relax. Bryan can be found pecking away at his computer keys most nights, working on lesson plans. Lucy is Lucy. She counted to 10 in Spanish the other night in front of her grandparents. They are now SURE that she's the genius we've been thinking she must be. We DID tell them that she could count that way-guess they just needed to hear it for themselves.

Lucy discovered popcorn.

It is quite a tasty treat you know. She WILL eat the entire bowl if you let her. She's so skinny, we let her.

She has also been obsessed with her rain boots and jumping in puddles (although since the rain passed, I think we're over it now).

Bryan had a birthday (the 12th one he's had since I've been around-WOW!). What says "Happy Birthday" more than a cupcake with a tea light?

Lucy's got her volunteer pride going full strong, as well as the old duck obsession.

She still loves the camera and performing (most recently, she gets up in front of the t.v. and "leads" us in "music.") HELLO BROADWAY! I did always want to visit NYC.

We went to Baby Ella's 1st birthday party. Lu decided she was a huge fan of birthday parties, especially blow outs like Amber and Michael did for Ella.

We have been wearing all our custom made clothes and loving how well they twirl! Thanks to Faith for her beautiful creations!

I suppose the latest drama you might care to hear about came in the form of Lucy's most recent class move-up in school. She was supposed to move up from the class from hell on September 1st. I call her last class that name as she HATED school this summer, told us her teacher spanked her, and NEVER, I TELL YOU NEVER, came home with art work, a data sheet, NOTHING. Now, she was only there about 10 or 15 days total. Between vacation, laziness, sickness, and surgery, she was definitely home a lot more than she was there. But let me tell you, when we took her, it was an all out battle. Her teacher was LESS than warm and fuzzy, and we didn't care for her at all. Lu was not eating, taking 2-3 and a half hour naps while she was there-she was LITERALLY acting like a person who was DEPRESSED. A 2 year old should not be acting that way. We didn't "squeak" about it much since we knew in the fall she'd move out of that class.

I will tell you we did let the directors know about the alleged spanking. We were not too thrilled about that. And if you know Lu, you know she comes home and tells it like it is. "I kicked Kyle on the playground today and got in time out." OR "Kendall bit me so I pulled her hair." Yes, she tells it all. So, even though she's two, when she tells me, "Ms. Lauren spanked me and I don't like school," you know my mama radar is going off the charts!

So all that being said, they posted the new class lists a few days before the big move up. Hmmm, Lucy is not being moved up with all her friends to the preschool class. Odd. She's moving up, but to another toddler class...WITH NONE OF HER PEERS SHE HAS BEEN WITH SINCE SHE WAS FIVE MONTSH OLD. Hmmmm. Aren't we paying these "Child Development Center" folks an entire mortgage payment each month? Why is my child being held back and I haven't been informed of any issue. Radar, back up and going crazy. So, of course I ask what is up. The asst. director tells me, "Well, we think this would be a good fit for Lucy. She will be the oldest (they moved kids up by birthdays) and can be a leader, blah blah. She had a tough time this summer, blah blah. We think she'll do great. Let's try it and see, blah blah." Now, being an educator, I know what it is like to have some crazy parent in your face, not respecting your decisions. We've NEVER had a problem with our childcare choice (before this summer) and I was willing to give it a go. Lucy is social, so even though she had NO FRIENDS in her class, I knew she'd make new ones. However, I let the AD know that I was concerned about her being in class with kids who were just turning two, as Lucy was wise beyond her years. She assured me she'd be fine. Ok lady. We'll just see about that.

Fast forward to two days after the move. Lucy seems to have a good lead teacher in her new TODDLER class. She is ok with school, but tells me she gets upset when she has to leave her old friends on the playground. I decide to hang out in her class for a bit when I am there to pick her up. WELL THAT WAS THE FINAL STRAW FOLKS! When the teacher is telling the kids to "Use your words" BECAUSE THEY ARE UNABLE TO SPEAK- we have a problem. The kids in her new class are BABIES! HELLO, Lucy has been speaking in full sentences for a YEAR and you're telling me she can now step up and be a leader with THESE kids? Hello, she has to be a leader because she can't COMMUNICATE with ANY of her new "peers." Things didn't get better when I got the curriculum and saw they were working on: Types of clothes, the color RED, and learning the ABCs. Um, check, check, and check OVER A YEAR AGO. You can imagine my disdain for the whole situation at this point. Not to mention that Lucy told Bryan her NEW teacher told her she was too little to go to the class with her friends. DING DING DING. That's the bell! Let's put those gloves on and get in the ring!

Do I even need to tell you what happened next? Let's just say a brief meeting with the Director and AD was all it took for Bryan to make them see CLEARLY that if they wanted to continue caring for our child AND calling themselves a "Child Development Center" they needed to get a clue. We did offer to pay them MUCH LESS if they were going to just place kids by age in a room where they could finger paint in their poop. (Ok, that might have been a bit extreme, but you don't mess with my kid). Lucy spent this week as a "TRIAL PERIOD" in the preschool class. (HA! You just keep telling yourself that little director lady. We all know Lucy's staying in the preschool class) Each day her NEW NEW teachers told us, "She is doing great." or "I have a gifted kid too." or "She is a perfect fit for this class." BIG FAT DUH.

This past week gave me real insight into parenting and the rest of her life. It was the first time I felt like my child was wronged, and I didn't like what it made me feel and turn in to. Yes, the diapers and midnight feedings were hard, but nobody told me about this part!

The moral of this story is that you don't mess with Lucy and her parents.

You will get the smack down.